Disclaimer: This is a work of FICTION. Names, characters, brands, businesses, places, events and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.
Previously on Zombies At A Con, the group encounters a Tin Man who happens to be Mr. ZenLopez.
Act 1: The Assembly
Lita: OMG, Zen. Why the hell are you in a damn Al cosplay? You nearly gave us a heart attack.
Zen: My bad, Lita. I was trying to protect myself from these deadly creatures. *gets up and walks towards the group*
Crimson: That’s understandable but you didn’t have to run at us like a dude with a chainsaw.
Zen: Once again, I’m sorry. I was gonna take off the helmet and greet you but my head got stuck. And then I saw you girls running away so quickly, that I was like screw it—I need to catch up. If I have to die, I rather die with pretty girls by my side. *winks*
Lita: *ignores the flirting* Well you nearly killed us.
[While Zen was jabbering with Crimson and Lita, Blade and Gero stared at Zen in awe.]
Blade: *to Lyn* Is that the Mr. ZenLopez?
Lyn: Yeah. Lita, Crimson, and I are best buds with him on Discord. Why do you know him?
Blade: Not personally, but I am a fan of his Youtube Channel.
*Blade walks up to Zen.*
Hey, Mr. ZenLopez. I’m Blade and I just want to say I’m a huge fan of yours. *offers Zen a handshake*
Zen: *looks at Blade* Wait…Blade? Like BladeNinja?
Blade: *surprised by Zen’s knowledge of him* Yeah, that’s me. Do you know me?
Zen: *shakes Blade’s hand eagerly* YEAH, OF COURSE! I WATCH YOUR YOUTUBE CHANNEL. *Zen then embraces Blade in a bromance hug* I’m a huge fan. I was a sub to your channel since day one.
Gero: *listening to their conversation* I’m a fan too.
Zen: And you are?
Gero: Gero. On YouTube, I go by “Gero_the_Hero.”
Zen: WAIT. YOU’RE GERO! I watch your videos too! I’m a big fan as well.
Zen: Yeah *serious voice* until you smacked my beautiful face.
Marth: Face? You mean your abdomen.
Zen: Yeah, yeah same thing. Every part of my body is beautiful. *does Jojo pose*
[Realizing what he had done, Gero expressed anguish and remorse for hitting such a legendary Youtuber.]
Gero: I’m sorry. *bows down to Zen*
Zen: I’m playing, man. We cool. *looks at Marth* And you are? I know everyone except you.
Marth: Marth. I don’t know anyone here personally.
Zen: Oh really? You should obviously know me though. *hair flips* (Author’s Note: Zen doesn’t really have long hair. He pretends he does cuz he’s sassy.)
Marth: Nope. I don’t recall seeing you in my life.
Everyone except Zen: *gasp*
Zen: *bigger gasp* I’m appalled. I’m Mr. ZenLopez, the #1 Anime Review Youtuber in Inglewood! *does another Jojo pose* Gents want to be me. *points at Blade and Gero* Ladies love me. *points at Lita, Lyn, and Crimson* And puppies adore me. *shows a picture of his cute chihuahua*
Marth: Nope. Never heard of you.
Zen: Well, you better get your phone out and check.
[Marth gets out his phone and searches Zen on Youtube. The first thing that pops up is a video of Zen twerking at a club.]
Marth: Yeah, I can see the popularity. Over 1,000,000 views on this one.
[Marth shows the video to everyone.]
Crimson: Wow. I never knew you can bend like that Zen.
Lyn: My eyes, they burn.
Blade: Oh gawd…
Lita: Turn that off, Marth!
Gero: -serious tone- Twerk.
Zen: *turns bright red* NOT THAT ONE!
[Marth searches for Zen’s name again on Youtube and Zen’s Youtube Channel pops up.]
Marth: This one? *shows the phone to Zen*
Zen: Yes, that’s me. *smiles confidently*
Marth: You don’t seem that popular. I mean, Blade has 1,229 subs and you only have 298. (Author’s Note: When this was published, this was pure fact.)
Gero: He’s got a point.
Zen: It ain’t about the number of subs, man. You don’t know how many of those accounts are fake.
Blade: That’s true. *pauses and realized that they are talking about him* Hey! Wait a minute—
Zen: *interrupts* No offense, Blade. A great Youtuber is one with a great personality and I got that. I mean, look at my fangirls! *points at Lita, Lyn, and Crimson*
Lita: Yeah, sure… *weak smile*
Lyn: We aren’t your fangirls.
Crimson: *whispers loudly to Lyn and Lita* Aren’t we only friends with him cuz we feel sorry for him?
[Everyone stares at Crimson because of the shocking truth she conveyed.]
Crimson: I mean, yeah Zen…we are like best friends… *weak smile*
Zen: Oh okay. I see how it is, Crimson. *pretends to cry* You just want me to die here alone. I get it.
-pauses for a moment-
Zen: Naw, I’m just playin’. We cool.
[The group chit-chatted for a few more minutes until Marth got so annoyed that he felt the need to interrupt the “reunion.”]
Marth: I don’t mean to ruin your little “get-together.” But we should get out of here before we get eaten alive…
Crimson: Martha cares about us!
Marth: It’s Marth, and no. I just want to use you all as shields just in case a zombie chases me.
Crimson: *whimpers* So cruel.
Lyn: I’m pretty sure he’s joking, Crimson. If not, I volunteer as tribute. (Author’s Note: You aren’t going to have a heroic death. I won’t let you.)
Crimson: *gasp* NO LYN! YOU CAN’T DIE! *Clings on to Lyn for dear life but Lyn gives an annoyed face*
Lita: Lyn, you aren’t going to be a human sacrifice, but Marth does have a point. We should get out of here.
Blade: I agree, Lita. But maybe we should make a plan first.
Gero: Plans are good.
Zen: Yeah, and we should elect a leader, grab some weapons, and grub too.
Lyn: I second that.
Crimson: Yes food! 😀
Zen: But first, let me get out of this Al suit cuz *sings* it’s “getting hot in here.”
Lyn: *sings along* “So take off all your clothes.”
Zen: Damn, Lyn. If you say so.
Lyn: I was referring to the Nelly song.
Zen: I know. I just wanted to emphasize my hotness to you. *winks*
Lyn: Yeah no.
Lita: You better have clothes under there for real though.
Zen: I do. *checks* Wait never mind, I don’t. Someone get me some clothes, please!
[The group ignores Zen’s need of clothes and decide to ditch him. (I’m kidding.) What they did do though was sit down, campfire style, and decide their next move. I’ll tell you what happens there in the next episode but until then, enjoy Zen’s suffering.]
Zen: Seriously though, someone help me!